Thoughts of a related time and place have enveloped my journey here. I have fallen prey to the undisciplined practice of living in the "what if" syndrome. I see my days march along and wonder what consequences would befall me if i had done this or done that. i realize that this way of thinking is a corrupt way, and to be more precise... it is an unhealthy view on the universe in general. Shouldn't i be more concerned with the here and the now... but there i go again. i keep doing this to myself. the now is what i live in. not the past, or any alternate reality in this present, or even in the impending future. i plan and schedule, but it is the now that i function within. so i make plans to not make plans. striving for a future where my present consists of whole-hearted plans of the now. the now. the here.

The beginning of my life.

Copyright 2000 by pauly

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